Blurry Eyed and Zombified

building, dark, house

If there was a rope, I’d be at the end of it.  White knuckled and hanging on with the last of my fading strength.  I thought I had a lot on my plate before; now add grief to the mix, and I’m officially burnt out.

The last two days at work have been an emotional roller coaster.  I am the one and only HR person for a group of 200, so it’s my job to console employees as they try and come to grips with the tragedy of a lost coworker.  It’s also me who talks with the widow to discuss life insurance and benefits.  Between meetings and tears, I’m taking calls from my lawyer, realtor, mortgage broker, and contractors because my possession date is in one week. For those new to my blog — I sold in Dec, moved into a rental a week before Christmas, purchased a condo, and now moving again in two weeks.  I’m picking out counter tops and flooring, organizing home insurance, setting up all utilities, and arranging help for the move.  And that, my friends, was just today.

Afterwork, I will head to the gym to teach my fitness class, and then it’s home to study for the final exam I have this Sunday.  I’M DONE.  Finished — there is nothing left in the tank.   My eyes are blurred and my head is throbbing.  I just want to sleep.

Haha — sleep…. what the “F” is that?  My girlfriends son was up again all night playing video games.  NEVER again will I rent a basement suite from a friend.  Nothing good comes from it.

This will all be over in two weeks.  Until then, I’m the walking dead.  Surviving only on coffee, wine, and sleeping pills.  Someone wake me when it’s all over.

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12 Comments Add yours

  1. SpaghettiSam says:

    I hope things get easier and you are eventually able to get some sleep.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Ms. SG41 says:

      Thank you. I have faith it will all be good in two weeks

      Liked by 1 person

  2. mahbuttitches says:

    Beautiful. Your words are beautiful. Your current crapfest, on the other hand… well, it’s certainly pushing your buttons. You are handling it so well though!!! I don’t know you, but everything you’ve described I’ve felt so many times. It’s incredible that you could come write it out, it took me so long to get there. Thank you so much for sharing your story, and that song was amazing!! I genuinely needed to hear that, I can’t thank you enough for it 🙂 I hope you are well, despite everything 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Ms. SG41 says:

      Wow thank you for the kind words. You made my day.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. mahbuttitches says:

        My pleasure, for sure. Stay strong, beautiful!

        Liked by 1 person

  3. SeekingGod2 says:

    Hang in there. Inch by inch. You’ve made it so far. Days will fold into each other, and you’ll be at the other end of this time.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Ms. SG41 says:

      I know. It feels like time is standing still but I know it will be over soon

      Liked by 1 person

  4. nkdwhtguy says:

    I love your writing. Even when you are having a bad time, and you surely are now, you always make me smile when I read your posts. You’ve come a long way since before the holidays and the end is near (no! not the end of the rope, lol) but the end of the road to your new home. And you always choose just the right song. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Ms. SG41 says:

      Haha well thank you. I appreciate the compliment. I love that song. I heard “Hey man, nice shot” on the radio tonight. It might be the inspiration to my next post. Thanks so much for reading and commenting. I love hearing from you

      Liked by 1 person

  5. summerSHINES says:

    You’re doing so well my lovely 💜💜💜

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Ms. SG41 says:

      Thank you. How are the legs?

      Liked by 1 person

      1. summerSHINES says:

        I’ve joined the gym today so my legs are tired 😂 I’m having pain in my hips and knees so I’m having to run shorter distances 😕😣 Still loving the exercise though 😊

        Liked by 1 person

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