MY Unusual Holiday

   When you think “holiday season”, you typically envision parties, family gatherings, friend meet ups etc etc.  The holidays are meant for spending time with loved ones, while eating fattening foods and drinking large amounts of alcoholic beverages.   I love the holidays. BUT this year was not a typical year.  I did get to…

Money Makes Living Hell

Money, money, money, brings anxiety to town. Expenses lurk in darkness waiting to bring their stress inducing face to light.   Life is one big money pit that pulls you down, down to the middle of hell. You dig your claws in, hoping to remain above water.  But soon you drown. Farther.  Down. Blackness everywhere….

Ride of My Life

“It’s never too late to change your life for the better. You don’t have to take huge steps to change your life. Making even the smallest changes to your daily routine can make a big difference to your life.” ― Roy T. Bennett, The Light in the Heart   What a ride 2016 has been….

A Week of Christmas

All moved in to my temporary home.  I have an accepted offer on a condo that I will be moving in to at the end of January.  There are subjects to remove and renovation contractors to interview, but this week I’m going to try to slow down and have Christmas.  One week.  I’m going to…

2 Nights

The agony of walking through these unfamiliar yet memorized halls is more than I can take.  There’s a void in my heart.  I’ve taken refuge in these walls for ten years.  My anxiety hidden from the world.  Now the walls come down and I am forced to face what lies ahead — the unknown.  …

REV Me UP

If you don’t use it you lose it.  SEX, I’m talking about sex.  S. E. X. — SEX.  God do I miss having sex.  I don’t know if this goes for everyone, just women, or just me, but a lack of sex has dramatically reduced my natural sex drive, which used to be extremely healthy….

Frozen in Time

It’s still dark outside, and the snow has been falling all night.  It’s a winter wonderland; perfect for Christmas.  I’m tucked in my bed with my dog laying at my side.  Coo-coo-ca-choo Mrs. Robinson, Jesus loves you more than you will know…. wo wo wo…  This is my last Sunday in my home.  Seven short…

The End is Near

This is the last weekend before my move.  Mixed emotions is a total understatement — I’m a walking time bomb.  Yesterday, I lost another property; this one was only on the market for 1 day.  BOOM gone.  I cried all day, and ended my night with a bottle of wine.  I’m the first to admit…

Anxiety Gets Shit Done

Never once will you hear me say I love my anxiety.  I don’t — I hate it.  Anxiety makes life way harder than it needs to be.  However, I will say anxiety gets shit done.  At least mine does. I’m always the first to arrive, and I’m the first to complete my work projects.  I’ve never…

Down Right F’d Up

Another house offer down the fucking tubes. This time because the complex doesn’t allow dogs.  Well middle finger swinging at you strata mongrels.  Yes I’m a bit drunk right now and I don’t care.  My anxiety is fucking killing me and I needed a break.  Tomorrow I will be all grown up again– right now…

A Date For Christmas

This little picky mc picktser has been a single gal for something like 4ish years.  In those 4 years, I have had some dates, but nothing to write home about.  I’m picky…. straight up. The hardest time, in my opinion, to be single is the holidays.  Being alone during Christmas is hard, but I try not…

Let’s Get Physical

MY BODY HURTS LIKE A MOTHA…..F.   Severe anxiety has added more stress to my usual muscle sorentess.  My workouts have been mild in comparison to my normal routine simply because my body hurts.  There isn’t a part of my body that isn’t screaming at me, so I am going to take the night off…