“You attract what you put out there.”
These are the words of advice I received from an acquaintance regarding my unpleasant dating experiences. Everyone is entitled to his or her opinion, but some people should keep their options to themselves. I personally take offense to this useless piece of love advice, and here’s why.
First, I think it is completely ignorant to tell someone they attract (ask for) inappropriate behaviour from the opposite sex. How exactly am I attracting this in my life? Because I use dating sites to meet men, does that mean I’m asking for it? I don’t believe it does. If what she meant was a LAW OF ATTRACTION type scenerio, then she’s wrong. I most definitely have not told the universe that I want to meet rude, disrespectful men. Nope I did not do that. I wonder if she meant that I’m rude and disrespectful; therefore, that’s what I’m attracting? If that’s the case, I’m deeply hurt. I pride myself on being kind, respectful, and caring.
Secondly, I don’t believe there is some magic formula to finding love. If you do this and that, or that and this, you will meet the one….bullshit. My personal experiences with falling in love all happened by chance. Right place; right time. I put myself out there the best I can, and all I can do is hope for the best. I have no interest in changing myself or my behaviours in an effort to meet someone.
It is completely rude to insinuate that I am flawed; therefore, I won’t find love. We are all different, and our life experiences will vary from one another. I believe in being me. I am not perfect, but I am a good person who deserves to be treated the same way I treat others. If that isn’t good enough, so be it.