Attract This !#@

“You attract what you put out there.”

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These are the words of advice I received from an acquaintance regarding my unpleasant dating experiences.  Everyone is entitled to his or her opinion, but some people should keep their options to themselves.   I personally take offense to this useless piece of love advice, and here’s why.

First, I think it is completely ignorant to tell someone they attract (ask for) inappropriate behaviour from the opposite sex.  How exactly am I attracting this in my life?  Because I use dating sites to meet men, does that mean I’m asking for it?  I don’t believe it does.   If what she meant was a LAW OF ATTRACTION type scenerio, then she’s wrong.  I most definitely have not told the universe that I want to meet rude, disrespectful men.  Nope I did not do that.  I wonder if she meant that I’m rude and disrespectful; therefore, that’s what I’m attracting?  If that’s the case, I’m deeply hurt.  I pride myself on being kind, respectful, and caring.

Secondly, I don’t believe there is some magic formula to finding love.  If you do this and that, or that and this, you will meet the one….bullshit.  My personal experiences with falling in love all happened by chance.  Right place; right time.  I put myself out there the best I can, and all I can do is hope for the best.  I have no interest in changing myself or my behaviours in an effort to meet someone.

It is completely rude to insinuate that I am flawed; therefore, I won’t find love.  We are all different, and our life experiences will vary from one another.  I believe in being me.  I am not perfect, but I am a good person who deserves to be treated the same way I treat others.  If that isn’t good enough, so be it.




4 Comments Add yours

  1. I love this! I have been told this many times (even though I do not date) – in my case people say such things to “explain” that I am alone because bla blaaa (they cannot even think that I am happy this way). I certainly agree with you that it is not their business and it is very rude/mean/useless to put the “blame” on you. yes love is magical and happens for no logical reason and one cannot make it happen by following rules. And no one, I repeat no one, would like to attract the wrong people in their lives and ask for them. so well said my friend 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Smartygirl41 says:

      Thank you. I’ve was hurt by her comment, but I can’t help other people’s rudeness

      Liked by 1 person

      1. I would be hurt too and I have been hurt those times I was told so.try not to let other people’s rudeness to affect you so much (so easy to say; I know. my sister told me this today, which very well fits the struggles I have had lately..) anyways; just know that for ever rude person out there there is a good person like yourself 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

  2. SeekingGod2 says:

    Well, we’re not dating, but we are friends and I can’t say I was attracted to your rude, bitchy self. Haha! On the contrary!

    Liked by 1 person

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