I’ve changed my mind; I don’t want to do this… for the love of god will someone please give me a piece of nicorette! What have I done; why am I even doing this to myself?
Yesterday it all seemed such a great idea: Transformation — quit chewing my nicorette gum. WTF! I hate this. I can’t sit still, I’ve chewed a whole package of Colbalt 5 (peppermint gum sans nicotine). I feel completely agitated, restless, irritable; I feel f*cking terrible. My racing thoughts keep coming back to me jumping in my car, rushing to the drug store and buying a package of nicotine gum: orange flavour.
Besides putting me into the poor house, what’s the big deal. It’s just gum. It’s not like I’m addicted to crack cocaine or meth. Although, by the way I’m acting, one would think I’m coming off something pretty heavy. I’m somewhat committed to this stupid useless goal, but I’m not promising anything. I’ve already come off all my anxiety meds, so this just seems extra cruel.
Alright, let’s talk about something else to get my mind off this gum thing. Besides, even though I imagine this little post has you all on the edge of your seats, I’m sure I can come up with something a little more blog worthy. Maybe we could talk about just how irritating people seem when you aren’t at your best.
Have you even noticed when you’re tired, or withdrawing, or PMSing, just how difficult interacting with others is? I know it’s me; not them, but right now, it sure feels like it’s actually them. It is likely in my best interest to go straight home afterwork, shut all my curtains, lock the doors, turn of my phones, and sit in the corner to rock myself to some kind of peace.
OMG, writing is not helping. I still want gum, and I want it bad. I’m going to try walking the hallways, and then I’m going to find some innocent co-worker to unload all my issues on because I feel like it.
Sorry, I don’t know what I’ve written, and I’m in no mood to go back and proof read — so if you made it all the way until the end of this post, you’re a champ. Thanks for reading my tangled messed up withdrawing ramble. Stay tuned for more page turning rants over the next few days.
Sending my thoughts to all my blogger friends who are having a tough time today.