Hitting The Reset Button

Sometimes receiving bad news is a blessing in disguise.  This past Sunday, I found out that my 2007 Hyundai Accent needs a replacement motor.  Very frustrating considering I have kept her well-maintained and she only has 127,000km on her.  I did not take the news well, as I am currently making a serious effort to pay down my debt.  I’ve been in a bit of a funk lately, so my initial reaction to this news was defeat.  However, I am not one to sit around and feel sorry for myself, so I have spent the past two days sourcing out solutions to this problem.

First, I have an appointment booked with my bank to re-evaluate my debt allocation.  I would like to see if I can find a better pay-down solution, which will also allow me to borrow a small amount to put towards my vehicle situation.  Once I understand how much money I have to work with, I will weigh out my options.

Secondly, I am getting a second opinion.  A friend referred me to a mechanic who is willing to check my car over at no cost; I’m very thankful for this.  If it turns out I can repair the car for a reasonable price, my problem’s solved.

Slightly jumping ahead of myself, I have decided if I must buy something new, I want a truck. There are many reasons why I shouldn’t buy a truck: more money on gas, tires will be more expensive, not as easy to parallel park, harder to get into.  However, I think my reason for wanting one outweighs the cons.

A truck is the button I need to reset this little funk I’ve been in.  I need to give my life a little facelift, and what I have decided I need is declutterfication (is that a word?)  I want to get rid of all my STUFF.  Old furniture, snowboarding equipment, 20 year old rollerblades, old printers, camping equipment, dog kennels, etc.  I’m not a hoarder, and I probably have less stuff than the average person, but lately, I feel cluttered and sufficated by things.  Items I keep for “just in case.”  Just in case I decide to snowboard again after 8 years, possibly I will put new wheels on my rollerblades and go for a ride, maybe I will camp.  No, I will most likely not do any of these things.  I only snowboarded because my ex-husband wanted me to, I prefer going for a run over rollerblading, and camping will not be done unless there’s a house on wheels coming with me.

It’s time to shed my belongings that hold no value to me.  Rid myself of objects that are reminders of who I used to be and not who I have become.  I want to feel light and free — I want to press the reset button on my life.

This epiphany is a direct result of my broken down car.  An event that brought a great amount of anxiety, also brought a new direction and goal.  I have good and bad days dealing with anxiety and depression, and today is a good day.  I believe that this new goal will bring many more good days.  The one thing I am most proud of is my ability to achieve my goals.   Goals give me some kind of direction in life, which keeps my mind focused and less anxious.

Now — figure out how to get a truck!




One Comment Add yours

  1. thecfomom says:

    Great to epiphanies when you least expect them. I feel you on the parallel parking though.

    Liked by 1 person

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