Dating…. (sigh). I don’t know exactly when this happened, but dating is no longer something I look forward to.
My last relationship ended almost three years ago, and after a year off to find myself, I stepped back into the dating world. The last time I was single, I was 34, and I remember it being a lot more fun. I met men at run club or through friends of a friend. Online dating was an option, but it certainly wasn’t my only one.
I don’t know if it is my age, or if things really have changed. I can’t remember the last time I was invited over to a dinner party, where there was a potential of meeting other singles. A dinner party invite now involves me, a bunch of married couples, and if I’m lucky, (insert sarcasm here) all of their kids.
I purposely go places that I think single men will be: the gym, coffee shops, book stores, grocery stores, community functions, etc. Unfortunately, men seem to be shy and will not approach me. I see them looking at me, and so I give them an encouraging smile that’s meant to say, “I’m available”. I guess I haven’t mastered the art of facial gestures. If only I could spark up a conversation with a guy without sounding like a complete idiot. For some reason, if I am remotely interested in someone, I act like its my first day talking. I’m only smooth when I’m drunk, and if I’m drunk, I won’t remember them anyway.
So that leaves me with online dating sites and apps. I have a profile a free dating site, and I’ve recently signed up for Tinder (not a good idea, if you are looking for quality). Over the past 2 years I have endured the most painfully awkward moments of my life, not to mention all of the inappropriate text messages I have received. When did it become ok to send a complete stranger a picture of your “bits”? Seriously people, I am not interested in being visually assaulted by my phone every time I give my number out.
It seems that online dating has made people feel that “getting to know someone” isn’t required anymore. Taking it slow, going on dates, and building friendships, seem to be a thing of the past. Is online dating nothing more than the fast food of love?
I feel lucky that I have great friends and an active life. I don’t mind being single, and I have no intentions of settling for less than what I want; however, I don’t think I am going to find it online.